Wednesday, September 21, 2011

'Gram of the Week (9/5/11 - 9/11/11)

THE WEEK THAT WASN'T !

This week will go down as being more interesting for the deliveries that didn't happen, as opposed to the ones that did.

On Monday, a woman called me to inquire about a delivery at a hospital in NYC for someone who had minor surgery. Each hospital has its own policy regarding deliveries, as well as what costumes are permitted. It's always best to check beforehand. Most hospitals DO allow singing telegrams, but generally limit delivery time to visting hours. Some restrict balloons and very often "suggest" that anything loud and outrageous be toned down. So even gorillas and chickens pass the smell test.

But this woman had asked about a grim reaper! A grim reaper?" Really? "A grim reaper at a hospital?"

"Why not?", was her reply.

"Maybe the fact that some people go into a hospital but don't come out. I think it would be alarming to have the grim reaper share an elevator with a relative of a recently deceased person....not to mention it's really in poor taste and inappropriate. I am
sure the hospital won't allow it. And even if they did, I wouldn't be interested in doing this delivery for you."

"But you're in the service industry!" she snapped.

"Yes, I am," I replied, "but I have certain guidelines that have to be met. A delivery like this could prove to be hurtful to someone, just by an unintentional meeting. And that's not the kind of business I run. I can't fill the request that would result in your satisfaction."

"Well!" she clearly was clueless and exasperated by my response. Then she hung up.

I'm guessing she got someone else somewhere to fill her request. As I like to say, "wouldn't wanna touch
that karma with a ten-foot pole!"

My second
non-delivery started out as a delivery. A secretary called on behalf of her boss to order a Get Well singing telegram for her boss's partner, who was home recovering from being hit by a car while bicycling. At first she asked for a rabbi, because the partner was Jewish. After being told it's not on the costume list and suggesting the man might be offended, she opted for a singing nun, because her boss was Catholic. She claimed her boss approved it. I kept asking to speak to her boss to help clarify the order, but she said he was too busy to talk and she was authorized to do the ordering, which she did, using his corporate credit card.

The delivery was to take place the next day, between 1:00 - 2:00 PM. The next day at 12:36 PM, 24 minutes before the delivery is to take place and ten minutes away from arriving at the house of the recipient, Dina calls to say her boss wishes to cancel the telegram because HE thinks the nun is inappropriate and offensive.

"But you
ordered it yesterday, fully cognizant of it being a nun, specifically because I didn't have a rabbi."

"Well, my boss changed his mind and no longer wants it." she said.

I told her she could change the costume, but couldn't cancel the delivery because I need 48 hour's notice and she's only giving me 20 minutes. I'd be happy to redeliver with another costume later that day, but she wasn't budging.

"This is not a shirt you can return to Macy's!" I said. "Let me talk to your boss"

Again, with the "He's too busy to talk to you. I'm authorized on his behalf to make the decision."

I should have just said that it was too late, I couldn't get hold of the messenger in time, and left it at that. Instead, I headed to my next delivery. Within four days, I got a letter from American Express with an attached letter from Dina's boss saying he was disputing the charge with all sorts of made-up excuses that made me look like I run a business that could get a Triple F rating from the Better Business Bureau. (30 years of great customer service being thrown down the drain!).

Thankfully, I have all the calls and time-stamps on record, as well as
every page of my website showing the cancelation policy clearly stated. Over the course of the 30 years I've been in business, there have been about four disputes over charges and each time American Express has sided with me 100%, without even having to make a partial refund.

What's ironic is that in each case, specific to the delivery, there is something the customer could have said that would have left me defenseless. Of course that "reason" would have been a lie, but nevertheless, I would have no choice but to refund the money to the customer. (For reasons you can understand, I'll elect not to disclose it.)

So now, having submitted my data to American Express, I await the resolution which I expect to be in my favor. I'd much rather be concentrating on making someone's day a little happier!

Kerry
Preppygrams

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