I also direct one or two productions a year. This spring, I was asked to be musical director for the cabaret. Adelphi cabarets are a 40-year tradition at Adelphi. They are kind of like Saturday Night Live skits with musical numbers. Sometimes they are original songs, written specifically for the show, and sometimes musical parodies; send-ups of popular show tunes or Top 40.
This year's cabaret was called "Walkie Talkie to Wi-Fi" or MOdernn technoLugY and the Dumbbing DoWn of AmeriKah LOL" (sic). It was directed by Kelley Lynn, a very funny comedienne, writer, and stand-up comedy teacher.
As we were writing material for the Cabaret, Rebecca Black was hitting the charts with her insipid, tedious, pedestrian, but CATCHY tune called "Friday". As a musical composer, that song broke all the rules on what NOT to do for music writing and as a father of a 16-year old, I felt sorry for the abuse, vitriol, and hate that was undeservingly heaped upon this young girl. It takes guts to endure that maltreatment. I wanted to write a parody of that song in the show, but needed a subject.
If you've been paying attention, you know that May 21st was the day chosen as the Rapture by "prophet" Harold Camping. I felt compelled to write a song about the upcoming Rapture, with complete confidence that we would all still be here on Sunday, May 22nd. I used Rebecca Black's "Friday" as my template.
Below is the Youtube clip of the cabaret dress rehearsal the night before we opened.
Funny thing is, some people thought it was serious and that we were some kind of fundamentalist, evangelical group crowing about the End Times!
The Rapture. Lyrics are below.
May 21st, waking up that morning
Gotta be fresh, gotta be prepared
Gotta have my purse and
some clean underwear
Time's runnin' out, the horn's a-blowin'
Right before your eyes we'll be disappearing
Gotta get down to the bus stop
Gotta check the bus, I won't see my friends
No one in the front seat
No one in the back seat
Gotta make your mind up
Don't be left behind
It's Rapture, Rapture
All the good souls get captured
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
Rapture, Rapture
It's not a load of crap, sir
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
7:30, I'll be drivin' on the highway
I'll disappear from behind the wheel
Float, float, I'm gonna float
Naked as a jaybird
Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus
Catholics will all die
Too late to save your soul
Now you know it
Sittin' by His right hand
Sittin' by His left hand
Put your head between your legs
Kiss your ass goodbye!
It's D-Day, D-Day
"When you'll no longer be"-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
D-Day, D-Day
That's your R.I.P.-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
Time to shut your trap, sir (trap, sir)
This May i-is Rapture (Rapture)
Me-me-me so excited
Me so excited
Me gonna disappear that day
Soon it will be Judgement Day
Then Rapture comes after...wards
Can't wait for life on Earth to end!
(RAPTURE RAP)
End Times -- It's time for Revelation
The train is pulling from the station
Your choice, rejoice, where will you dwell?
Up in Heaven or the fires of Hell
Watch out! They're talking kinda cryptic
Mark of the Beast -- apocalyptic
Made His list and checked it twice
Who's been naughty and who's been nice?
It's Rapture, Rapture
All the good souls get captured
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
Rapture, Rapture
It's not a load of crap, sir
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
It's D-Day, D-Day
"When you'll no longer be"-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
D-Day, D-Day
That's your R.I.P.-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Looking forward to the end Times!
Gotta be fresh, gotta be prepared
Gotta have my purse and
some clean underwear
Time's runnin' out, the horn's a-blowin'
Right before your eyes we'll be disappearing
Gotta get down to the bus stop
Gotta check the bus, I won't see my friends
No one in the front seat
No one in the back seat
Gotta make your mind up
Don't be left behind
It's Rapture, Rapture
All the good souls get captured
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
Rapture, Rapture
It's not a load of crap, sir
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
7:30, I'll be drivin' on the highway
I'll disappear from behind the wheel
Float, float, I'm gonna float
Naked as a jaybird
Jews, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus
Catholics will all die
Too late to save your soul
Now you know it
Sittin' by His right hand
Sittin' by His left hand
Put your head between your legs
Kiss your ass goodbye!
It's D-Day, D-Day
"When you'll no longer be"-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
D-Day, D-Day
That's your R.I.P.-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
Time to shut your trap, sir (trap, sir)
This May i-is Rapture (Rapture)
Me-me-me so excited
Me so excited
Me gonna disappear that day
Soon it will be Judgement Day
Then Rapture comes after...wards
Can't wait for life on Earth to end!
(RAPTURE RAP)
End Times -- It's time for Revelation
The train is pulling from the station
Your choice, rejoice, where will you dwell?
Up in Heaven or the fires of Hell
Watch out! They're talking kinda cryptic
Mark of the Beast -- apocalyptic
Made His list and checked it twice
Who's been naughty and who's been nice?
It's Rapture, Rapture
All the good souls get captured
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
Rapture, Rapture
It's not a load of crap, sir
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Lookin' forward to the End Times
It's D-Day, D-Day
"When you'll no longer be"-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to that
Rapture weekend
D-Day, D-Day
That's your R.I.P.-Day
Everybody's lookin' forward to the Rapture
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Vanishing, Vanishing (Yeah)
Death, death, death -- fun !
Looking forward to the end Times!
Kerry
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